I love this song so so much, even before I was a Pilot I loved this song, and of course Savage Garden.
The blog I am about to write is very different. It would be in 2 parts. I will talk a little about every major aspect of my life as of now, starting with Career. I am really nervous about my results and want them to be out soon so the misery could be ended once and for all... Other than that, in the past 5 minutes I have thought of nothing.
Love, on the other hand I am thinking a lot about. I am terribly missing The Brit today, after so many days. I mean I do miss him a lot everyday but I don't face it. I try to avoid it. I try to indulge in other things which do give me momentary pleasure but then it just all comes back to that. Maybe I don't miss him, it's just that I miss the whole idea of someone being there for me. Not anyone, but someone who really did care. It's going to be three months soon since I have heard from him and it kinda sucks. I hate that I am such a sucker for love. I hate complaining this way, and I just hate this whole being alone business. I don't think I am cut out for this. I was having a talk with Snow White the other day and I did tell her that I had stopped looking for the right guy coz I was always meeting the wrong ones, whenever I tried to find him, so now I am going to stop and stay put, and wait for him to find me. But what if he doesn't? I don't know, I don't really have a lot of time on my hands. This was definitely not the plan.
I must admit this. I do feel physically deprived at times. I hardly ever talk about it. But I miss being intimate. Maybe that is why I feel the need to have someone around me. I don't mean sex. Just the closeness. What is wrong with the men these days?! Ughhhh.. At least the ones around me are so stupid that they hate stuff like cuddling and just being together. Talk about sex and they're all "hey baby" again, MORONS!
Friendships, I think the new connections than I have made in the past few days have been really helping me out. It's quite amusing that I never get along with people with a stereotypical mindset around me who are always available in flesh and blood, but I seem to be very connected to this really small community that has formed virtually. I think the blogging community is way cooler than any other there is, because it is a group of sane individuals who all have a sense of self and are opinionated and at the same time can agree or disagree with anyone else's opinions and still have respect for each other. Real life people who think bloggers are losers need to get a real life themselves, they would not be able to survive one day in this world of blogging coz most of them live in denial and are afraid to face their innermost fears. I am talking about the people who call me a nerd for blogging. I am sure all of you have some of such people around you too.
I feel so free and light, in a weird way the phrase "the world is my oyster" makes much more sense to me right now.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Career, I think I need to get a good job this year under any circumstances. It has been enough and I have been waiting for a really long time but this is not how it should be. Besides if I wanna shop more I need to make more moolah.
Love, well, nothing special going on in that department, other than waiting, and waiting some more. I feel foolish sometimes. But then it's okay I guess?
Friendships, I am happy that I have met so many new people online from various corners of the world who are like minded and I can finally fit in somewhere. Bloggers rock!
Okay now that I am done experimenting, let me tell you guys that I wrote the first part of this post without my pants. Then I went and put my pants on and blogged the second part. There was this thread I read on 20sb yesterday (If you're on 20sb you should totally check it out here) and although I am not a very social person on forums I so had to comment on it! It was about blogging with/without pants. I decided to give it a try and wow it does make quite the difference. I am apparently more casual and free when I am without pants. Oh and by blogging pants-less I do not mean naked from the waist down. I still wore my girly boxers. Gosh I am really jobless. I really am.
I think I'll stick to my PJ's though! I have that habit too, no matter how hot it is outside, I ALWAYS sleep with a blanket/sheet. I guess if I start blogging sans the pants I would be procrastinating a lot more than I already do!
By the way the window guy rides a bike and wears a silver helmet. - Just an update :P I managed to see him while he was riding to work today.
Someone just told me that the results might be sent out today. Wish me luck guys!
Lots of Love,
Apfel
xoxoxo
The blog I am about to write is very different. It would be in 2 parts. I will talk a little about every major aspect of my life as of now, starting with Career. I am really nervous about my results and want them to be out soon so the misery could be ended once and for all... Other than that, in the past 5 minutes I have thought of nothing.
Love, on the other hand I am thinking a lot about. I am terribly missing The Brit today, after so many days. I mean I do miss him a lot everyday but I don't face it. I try to avoid it. I try to indulge in other things which do give me momentary pleasure but then it just all comes back to that. Maybe I don't miss him, it's just that I miss the whole idea of someone being there for me. Not anyone, but someone who really did care. It's going to be three months soon since I have heard from him and it kinda sucks. I hate that I am such a sucker for love. I hate complaining this way, and I just hate this whole being alone business. I don't think I am cut out for this. I was having a talk with Snow White the other day and I did tell her that I had stopped looking for the right guy coz I was always meeting the wrong ones, whenever I tried to find him, so now I am going to stop and stay put, and wait for him to find me. But what if he doesn't? I don't know, I don't really have a lot of time on my hands. This was definitely not the plan.
I must admit this. I do feel physically deprived at times. I hardly ever talk about it. But I miss being intimate. Maybe that is why I feel the need to have someone around me. I don't mean sex. Just the closeness. What is wrong with the men these days?! Ughhhh.. At least the ones around me are so stupid that they hate stuff like cuddling and just being together. Talk about sex and they're all "hey baby" again, MORONS!
Friendships, I think the new connections than I have made in the past few days have been really helping me out. It's quite amusing that I never get along with people with a stereotypical mindset around me who are always available in flesh and blood, but I seem to be very connected to this really small community that has formed virtually. I think the blogging community is way cooler than any other there is, because it is a group of sane individuals who all have a sense of self and are opinionated and at the same time can agree or disagree with anyone else's opinions and still have respect for each other. Real life people who think bloggers are losers need to get a real life themselves, they would not be able to survive one day in this world of blogging coz most of them live in denial and are afraid to face their innermost fears. I am talking about the people who call me a nerd for blogging. I am sure all of you have some of such people around you too.
I feel so free and light, in a weird way the phrase "the world is my oyster" makes much more sense to me right now.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Career, I think I need to get a good job this year under any circumstances. It has been enough and I have been waiting for a really long time but this is not how it should be. Besides if I wanna shop more I need to make more moolah.
Love, well, nothing special going on in that department, other than waiting, and waiting some more. I feel foolish sometimes. But then it's okay I guess?
Friendships, I am happy that I have met so many new people online from various corners of the world who are like minded and I can finally fit in somewhere. Bloggers rock!
Okay now that I am done experimenting, let me tell you guys that I wrote the first part of this post without my pants. Then I went and put my pants on and blogged the second part. There was this thread I read on 20sb yesterday (If you're on 20sb you should totally check it out here) and although I am not a very social person on forums I so had to comment on it! It was about blogging with/without pants. I decided to give it a try and wow it does make quite the difference. I am apparently more casual and free when I am without pants. Oh and by blogging pants-less I do not mean naked from the waist down. I still wore my girly boxers. Gosh I am really jobless. I really am.
I think I'll stick to my PJ's though! I have that habit too, no matter how hot it is outside, I ALWAYS sleep with a blanket/sheet. I guess if I start blogging sans the pants I would be procrastinating a lot more than I already do!
By the way the window guy rides a bike and wears a silver helmet. - Just an update :P I managed to see him while he was riding to work today.
Someone just told me that the results might be sent out today. Wish me luck guys!
Lots of Love,
Apfel
xoxoxo
10 comments:
Take time to find yourself. Quit looking for love so hard and it will inevitably find you. You'll appreciate it much more, too. Until then, I'll continue be your secret girlfriend. :P
Love you so much. ♥
Haha! That 20SB thread is the coolest one I've seen. thanks for sharing. Also, I love that Savage Garden song so much too!
Love love love you! Maybe love is like fishing, when you need to catch something you never can, you don't have the right bait, you aren't in the right spot, and it's the wrong time of day... but when you are fishing for fun, you always catch the biggest fish! Talk soon! xoxox
Love that song. "All her friends they've been tried for treason/And crimes that were never defined"...
The truth is, you never know when and if the right one might come along, so we're best off learning how to be comfortable with ourselves first and foremost. Hmmm, I tell myself this every day, and yet I wonder if even I believe it :)
Stacey,
Yeah, I'm going to stop looking for it. Let it come around when it has to. It's just difficult being single after so many years!! But now I have you, my secret girlfriend ♥♥♥
Hope,
Yeah, Savage Garden is one of those bands I would never forget coz they have played an important part during my growing up days :) That thread is super duper fun!!!
Fool,
That is the best thing I have heard all day!! I need to go fishing for fun :) Yayyyy
Hugs and Kisses and lots of love ♥ ♥
Chris,
That line is my most favorite line from the song! And you're absolutely right, I always know how to advise and tell people things but when it comes to myself it is just so hard to follow!! I need to take a major chill pill :P
I totally understand how you feel. Just allow yourself to feel what you feel. If you feel anger, shout it out. If you feel sad, allow yourself to cry. If you feel happy, celebrate the hell out of it. Even better is to find something constructive to do with those feelings. Blogging is great for that. Personally, I found music to be very therapeutic (Hellooo, Alanis Morissette.)
Focus on yourself and do things that bring you joy. You don't want your insecure self to be the one that does the choosing when you choose your future mates.
I understand how you feel about being single and feeling less than, but you aren't defined by your relationship status. You seem like a wonderful person. The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself. Relish that. :)
I wish you lots of luck and love!
xxHugsxx
Welcome to my blog Bella :)
You're right, and blogging has helped me a great deal. I started this blog for this same reason, coz I wanted to vent it all out. I found some amazing people on here and so far so good :) Music is more of a bitch for me coz well I tend to remember memories with the songs and most of the songs I loved now come with the added baggage. But I am getting rid of it, slowly and steadily :) Thank you so much for all the luck and love :) You just made my day!
Hugs
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