That is correct. This is my monthly bitchy PMS blog post and I don't even have to look for reasons for having to complain.
Warning : This is a completely pointless ranting post. Please do not read it if you're in a good mood :|
First of all, I have a non-raging Migraine. I don't get the deal with this. If it is a full fledged Migraine attack I can at least establish that and go sleep in order to feel better, with not being able to look at shiny and illuminated objects and stuff like that. But this is a non raging Migraine. Somewhere in between having and not having a Migraine. I don't know what the fuck to do. Like I can do everything but I am just terribly cranky and this stupid mild headache is just persistent and not making things any better. So I do not look like I am suffering but actually I am suffering more inside. fml.
Bloating and mood swings are at an all time high. Everything that I do is same as I do everyday but I am just mad at the world. I have no clue why. I cook everyday for The Writer but I am just not feeling like it today. Anyway I did cook in the end coz I got overly emotional and this was probably the first time I cried while slicing Onions when Onions were not the cause behind my tears. Then I kept blaming myself for being a bitch and called him up and asked him not to come over. To which he responded "okay". And of course since he did not persuade me at all I lost it. Then he said that he was JUST JOKING. WHAT? I really fail to understand the humor or the timing of that JOKE. Really. Needless to say I hung up, and he showed up at my place an hour later (he shouldn't have, coz The Monster was waiting to be unleashed).
I don't know if all ladies do this but this is how it always happens with me. I end up looking very pretty on the day when I am about to say some really mean and nasty things to a person, especially of the opposite sex. So when I answered the door I did receive some compliments from him which I ignored, and then it all began. He asked me why I was upset and when I refused to let him know, he insisted. Then he persuaded. Monster Unleashed. I am sure he will use this experience to write something for some screenplay in future.
What followed was a plethora of tears, coupled with a high pitched voice and continuous screaming, and I got really mad at him for not getting me a chocolate coz I was really craving for one and had asked him last night to get me a chocolate on his way when he comes to see me. He FORGOT. But that was not the real reason why I had asked for a chocolate. I had asked for it precisely coz I knew he would forget, and I did make my point. He forgets a lot. He forgets to call me up. He had been forgetting a lot lately. I guess this was the perfect timing for me to come out with whatever issues I had in my mind. Ever since we have started seeing each other, we have only been out thrice. That is excluding the time we went out before we started seeing each other. He comes over daily. I cook for him. He leaves here and goes to work and works till late hours, brain storming with his group and coming up with ideas. I call him a couple of times during this time just to say hi. Then we talk at night when he is really tired and is waiting to hang up, which mostly ruins the good byes.
When I was in Singapore, I had called him and he told me all these rave reviews about Kung Fu Panda 2 and I said that we will watch it together after I returned back. And now I have been asking for it daily just for him to say no and that he is not in the mood for it. What about maybe your girlfriend wants to watch the movie?! He is not good with pacifying people so I generally avoid talking to him during my mood swings or when I am low coz I know he is busy working and I do not wanna disturb his train of thought. But what when I really need you to show me some care?! It's not like he is not caring but why don't you spoil me once in a while?! I just get the feeling sometimes that he is mooching off me, you know. I mean I don't even work. I spend all the savings I have on getting groceries so I can cook for him everyday, and all he does is tells me what he wants to eat and asks me to make this dish or that. But not once has he gotten anything home or said that okay Apfel, don't cook today, let us just go out and have some fun. Or, hey Apfel, why don't you take some rest today? Or maybe ask me if I need anything so he can get it for me rather than me having to empty out the coins in my piggy bank.
I don't think that is very pricey of me to expect, is it? I mean whatever happened to Chivalry? I do agree with him on the point that it is way better to spend time at home rather than being out in the humidity and rains and spend on overpriced items at restaurants that wont even offer good service. I agree completely. But that does not mean I don't like going out at all. I also told him that I will not call him during the day anymore and he should call me if he needs to. He waited for me to calm down, hugged me and told me that no matter how he is with me, he is ready to try and change a little bit at a time coz I am not like any other woman that he has dated before. I guess he meant it in a good way. Dating a writer has this con. They are so so good with words, it is often hard to believe what they come up with. Also they have a knack of confusing the opposite person with what they say and the person only realizes the real meaning a couple of hours later when the meeting is over. Haha.
But I know that he meant what he said coz he looked right into my eyes and said all those things to me. It was a little blurry coz of all the tear logging in my eyes, but I could make it out. He also told me that he delayed his work just so that he would get to see me everyday. I never actually thought about that. I only thought about what I wanted and what I wanted to do and what I was going through. That is when the monster vanished and the doe eyed Apfel was back again.
And so, the monster was defeated and the victorious writer won his princess and sealed the deal with a kiss.
For all of you who made it through this post, you guys must really love me or my writing :D or maybe you were terribly bored. Or maybe you were going through the Part Monster Syndrome too!
Love
Warning : This is a completely pointless ranting post. Please do not read it if you're in a good mood :|
First of all, I have a non-raging Migraine. I don't get the deal with this. If it is a full fledged Migraine attack I can at least establish that and go sleep in order to feel better, with not being able to look at shiny and illuminated objects and stuff like that. But this is a non raging Migraine. Somewhere in between having and not having a Migraine. I don't know what the fuck to do. Like I can do everything but I am just terribly cranky and this stupid mild headache is just persistent and not making things any better. So I do not look like I am suffering but actually I am suffering more inside. fml.
Bloating and mood swings are at an all time high. Everything that I do is same as I do everyday but I am just mad at the world. I have no clue why. I cook everyday for The Writer but I am just not feeling like it today. Anyway I did cook in the end coz I got overly emotional and this was probably the first time I cried while slicing Onions when Onions were not the cause behind my tears. Then I kept blaming myself for being a bitch and called him up and asked him not to come over. To which he responded "okay". And of course since he did not persuade me at all I lost it. Then he said that he was JUST JOKING. WHAT? I really fail to understand the humor or the timing of that JOKE. Really. Needless to say I hung up, and he showed up at my place an hour later (he shouldn't have, coz The Monster was waiting to be unleashed).
I don't know if all ladies do this but this is how it always happens with me. I end up looking very pretty on the day when I am about to say some really mean and nasty things to a person, especially of the opposite sex. So when I answered the door I did receive some compliments from him which I ignored, and then it all began. He asked me why I was upset and when I refused to let him know, he insisted. Then he persuaded. Monster Unleashed. I am sure he will use this experience to write something for some screenplay in future.
What followed was a plethora of tears, coupled with a high pitched voice and continuous screaming, and I got really mad at him for not getting me a chocolate coz I was really craving for one and had asked him last night to get me a chocolate on his way when he comes to see me. He FORGOT. But that was not the real reason why I had asked for a chocolate. I had asked for it precisely coz I knew he would forget, and I did make my point. He forgets a lot. He forgets to call me up. He had been forgetting a lot lately. I guess this was the perfect timing for me to come out with whatever issues I had in my mind. Ever since we have started seeing each other, we have only been out thrice. That is excluding the time we went out before we started seeing each other. He comes over daily. I cook for him. He leaves here and goes to work and works till late hours, brain storming with his group and coming up with ideas. I call him a couple of times during this time just to say hi. Then we talk at night when he is really tired and is waiting to hang up, which mostly ruins the good byes.
When I was in Singapore, I had called him and he told me all these rave reviews about Kung Fu Panda 2 and I said that we will watch it together after I returned back. And now I have been asking for it daily just for him to say no and that he is not in the mood for it. What about maybe your girlfriend wants to watch the movie?! He is not good with pacifying people so I generally avoid talking to him during my mood swings or when I am low coz I know he is busy working and I do not wanna disturb his train of thought. But what when I really need you to show me some care?! It's not like he is not caring but why don't you spoil me once in a while?! I just get the feeling sometimes that he is mooching off me, you know. I mean I don't even work. I spend all the savings I have on getting groceries so I can cook for him everyday, and all he does is tells me what he wants to eat and asks me to make this dish or that. But not once has he gotten anything home or said that okay Apfel, don't cook today, let us just go out and have some fun. Or, hey Apfel, why don't you take some rest today? Or maybe ask me if I need anything so he can get it for me rather than me having to empty out the coins in my piggy bank.
I don't think that is very pricey of me to expect, is it? I mean whatever happened to Chivalry? I do agree with him on the point that it is way better to spend time at home rather than being out in the humidity and rains and spend on overpriced items at restaurants that wont even offer good service. I agree completely. But that does not mean I don't like going out at all. I also told him that I will not call him during the day anymore and he should call me if he needs to. He waited for me to calm down, hugged me and told me that no matter how he is with me, he is ready to try and change a little bit at a time coz I am not like any other woman that he has dated before. I guess he meant it in a good way. Dating a writer has this con. They are so so good with words, it is often hard to believe what they come up with. Also they have a knack of confusing the opposite person with what they say and the person only realizes the real meaning a couple of hours later when the meeting is over. Haha.
But I know that he meant what he said coz he looked right into my eyes and said all those things to me. It was a little blurry coz of all the tear logging in my eyes, but I could make it out. He also told me that he delayed his work just so that he would get to see me everyday. I never actually thought about that. I only thought about what I wanted and what I wanted to do and what I was going through. That is when the monster vanished and the doe eyed Apfel was back again.
And so, the monster was defeated and the victorious writer won his princess and sealed the deal with a kiss.
For all of you who made it through this post, you guys must really love me or my writing :D or maybe you were terribly bored. Or maybe you were going through the Part Monster Syndrome too!
Love
8 comments:
Apfel, pardon me for butting in, but after reading this post of yours I think The Writer is using and abusing you and you would be better off without him in your life.
I might agree a little with Don... But, I don't know anything about the situation, so take that with a grain of salt.
Also, I am notoriously untrustworthy of The Penises in the world, so I'm probably not the best one to listen to on this subject. :)
Don,
Thank you so much for your honest advice :)
Bi,
Yeah, I have decided to test him for few more days before I make a final decision about this. It is better to pull away now than be in a useless relationship later.
I'm might have to agree and third everything everyone else said. BUT I think it could be something else.
We humans are creatures of habit, so we can get used to a routine really, really fast. Unless you say something, he might think that you're perfectly fine with everything. If this routine doesn't work for you, break it and break it fast. Tell him your money is tight and that you cannot cook all the time. Let's see what he does. Don't be the one to call him all the time. Let's see if he calls you. Break the routine and watch his reactions very carefully.
I hope he's just so busy that he doesn't see that he might be (unintentionally) taking advantage of you. I really care for you, dear. I don't want to see you hurt. Tread carefully. I hope things work out for you. <3
I MIGHT have a small tear in the corner of my eye after reading your comment, Bridget, and I do care a lot for you too :) I hope that he realizes it too, I did talk to him about it last night. Will blog about it today. You are right, I need to watch his actions very carefully for the next few days. Thank You so much, for everything <3 :)
I'm usually the one to fall for big words, but the key is to see if people back up what they say with what they do.
He should not be forgetting a single thing that is related to you, and you are absolutely worth postponing his work for a few hours.
Hope the PMS and the migraine have worn off :)
Heyyyy Chris :)
I agree with you. The PMS has been better and the migraine has worn off :) Will update in the next post!
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